You Know You Need a New Lawyer When:

Susan Aguayo Miley
Client Relations Manager and Marketing Director

I thought I would lighten things up a bit with these 'tips' on when you need a new lawyer.  I stumbled upon these recently (well I have a good friend that loves to send lawyer jokes) and wanted to share them to hopefully put a smile on someone's face. 

  • The prosecutor sees your lawyer in the hall, and they high-five each other.
  • During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.
  • He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser."
  • He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."
  • During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.
  • Every couple of minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniels to the stand!" and proceeds to drink a shot.
  • He frequently gives juror No. 4 the finger.
  • Just before he says "Your Honor," he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.
  • Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever."
  • He giggles every time he hears the word "briefs."
  • He keeps citing the legal case of Godzilla v. Mothra.
  • He begins closing arguments with, "As Ally McBeal once said..."


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